OH CANADA....

Well the decision has been made...we are going HOME! Cisco's global relocation team approved our transfer back to Canada on Tuesday and after a sleepless, stomach-churning night we decided to go for it and head back home. It's not that I'm not thrilled to be returning to my country, it's just the logistics involved in moving that is keeping me up at night. We haven't told the kids yet, I thought I would wait until my Mom arrives next weekend so that I have some moral support! The boys seemed cool with the idea when we've mentioned it before but Maeghan is having none of it...urgh. She has a great life here, loves her school, her activities, her friends, and I know there will be tears and tantrums when we tell her...sigh. My parents, as usual, have been so supportive and within hours of telling them our plans they were sending me links for riding stables and ballet schools for Mae...hehe. I know it will all be fine but my nerves are still frazzled. Yesterday was a whirlwind of phone calls to local tradesmen for quotes on finishing up the jobs that need doing so that we can sell the house...why is it we never do these jobs until we need to sell? So the guy to fix the garage door is coming tomorrow, I have yet ANOTHER (long story) plumber coming to quote on installing the new shower in the main bathroom, and I've got three decorators doing up quotes to finish stripping wallpaper and then paint the halls and stairs. The house will look so great that it will be a shame to leave it! Hopefully it will mean a great profit for us in ££'s which will translate into a nice downpayment in $$'s! I will miss earning the mighty £ but we're not complaining about our offer. ;-) Next comes the big clear out, we need to dump some stuff before we go back across the pond, we have the most spoiled kids on the planet and our house regularly looks like Toys r Us vomited in every room. There are boxes in the loft we haven't opened since leaving Canada in 2000 so some stuff needs to go!

My biggest stress involves Connor and his education. He is doing so well right now and I know that uprooting him is going to be difficult and I'm aware that Ontario doesn't exactly have the best reputation for services to assist Autistic children. This will be a trial to find him a good school where he can be successful both academically and socially and I just keep my fingers crossed that there will be some kind of assistance for him. Worse case scenario: I go back to work and we put him in a private school or I homeschool him myself. This boy has all the potential in the world if we can channel it corrrectly and I would crawl over broken glass on my hands and knees to give him every advantage he deserves! Cameron I worry about too and I hope going back home where he sounds just like everyone else will help his confidence and he'll feel settled and happy. Mae is the one who will stand out this time because she has an English accent so socially she may find things a bit difficult. She is so sweet, kind, funny, and clever that I'm sure the kids will take to her quickly and she will make friends soon. Delsin is developing an accent and I'm sure once we go back and he is around kids with Canadian accents, he will lose his English one pretty quickly. He is at such a fun age that once he is in school he'll be as happy as a clam!

Tim seems very relieved to be out of the European system. He has tried and tried to get promoted here and keeps getting denied and he really honestly feels a lot of it has to do with him being "foreign". I think he will just feel better being back around people with the North American "style" because his enthusiasm and "joie de vive" just doesn't seem to work here where they are very reserved almost to the point of being "anal"..hehe. He seems very excited about the new job and seems to have clicked with some of his new "team" already. I'm not sure what sort of timeline he is looking at to switch over to the Canadian team but I know there is no way we can be out of the U.K. before the new year as so much depends on selling the house. Worse case scenario: Tim has to leave to work in Canada and the kids and I stay until the house is sold.

As for me...I'm okay with all of this one minute and the next I'm feeling panicked and scared. It's not just about me anymore so as the Mom I do all the worrying. I want my kids to be back in their native culture and then I'm worried that the schools aren't going to be as good and they will have trouble fitting in. I know that thousands of people move every year and kids change schools...hell, I did it myself as a military kid...but I also can remember the trepidation of having to be the "new kid" in class...ugh. I'll just do all I can to help my kids make an easy transition and once the stress is over and everyone is settled I will finally be able to celebrate being back in my home country and close to my friends and family again. I'm so looking forward to being able to hop in the car on a Friday and drive to the cottage...bliss! I'm really happy for my parents because I know that our being so far away has been difficult for them and we have been so lucky to have them spend so much time with us overseas. I can imagine how thrilled my Mom and Dad will be to have their grandchildren so close by...oh and they might be happy to have me around again. Once you have kids, it's all about them! Hahaha!

In other news...another busy week chez Taverner, as usual. I drove to Luton airport last night to meet with my brother who had flown in to one London airport (Stanstead) and then transfered to Luton for an overnight stay before flying out to France. How we found his hotel was quite an adventure and lets just say it's a good thing that I have lived in the U.K. for so long, ask Ken to tell you the story some time! He has been "on the road" for a few weeks working and although it was a bit of a nightmare to get to him, I made it and we spent about two hours together and enjoyed a nice meal. To be honest, I can't even remember the last time I saw Ken and he had changed so much that I'm not sure I would have recognized him if I bumped into him in a crowd. In my minds eye he is still my "scrawny little brother" but he's filled out more, he's a bit taller, and obviously older than my memories. One spooky moment came when he lit a cigarette (and YES I let him know I wasn't too happy about that) and I looked at his hands. They are my Dad's hands on my brother's body...very weird! He seemed okay but tired and we had a nice but short visit. I told him of our plans to move back home and his first thought was "Mom and Dad must be thrilled"...amen brother!

So another busy week is almost at an end and no doubt the weeks will fly by now that we have so much to do in so little time. I must dig out my painting clothes and get cracking on some of the walls this weekend. Time to spruce this place up and get it listed and sold. I never seem to get very attached to the homes I live in and won't be particularly sad to say goodbye to this one either, I wonder if that is a hangover reaction from being a military brat all those years ago? Now we just need to find a new home in the GTA to start another chapter in our lives.

Wish us luck!
Laura :o)